FOOLHARDY SQUIRRELS

“Hey Alex!” I called to my son as I walked toward his room. “I found out why the squirrels keep jumping out in front of our car lately!”

For the past few weeks we've had to play chicken with crazy squirrels as they darted out into the middle of the road. Clearly they're indecisiveness doesn't make it an easy game to play with them.

Alex came to his door. “Why?”

I held up my phone. “It's mating season!”

“In December?” Alex leaned against his door jam.

I looked back on my phone. “Says here that they have two litters a year. This one will be born in spring.” I looked up at him. “I guess the females are playing hard-to-get.”

Alex shrugged his shoulders. “Or the girls aren't too happy with who's chasing them.”

I thought about that for a second, then nodded in agreement. “That's true.” I walked over to his window to look up at our leafless oak tree. Up at the very top was a squirrel's nest swaying in the wind. “Or maybe they don't want to be pregnant through the winter, clinging on for dear life as their house gets blown around in a winter storm.”

Alex came over next to me to look up at the tree. “Or maybe you give them way too much credit considering the size of their tiny brains.”

“Hey!” but I had to laugh. “They're actually pretty intelligent! We've both watched them figure out ways to get into my bird feeders!” I looked over at him. “And remember last year when the Cooper hawk was in our back woods? We watched that mom squirrel carry all of her babies to another nest two houses away!”

Alex nodded as he looked back up in the trees. “That's true but it sure seems like their road skills could use a little help. I mean really! Just pick a side! This darting to the left then faking to the right just gets you hit!”

I looked back to my phone. “You know the site I was on actually explained that. It says they're hard wired to do that so they can confuse their predators.” I shrugged my shoulders. “I kind of get it now. A little zigging and zagging would confuse a hawk.”

Alex looked over at me. “Yeah, well they might want to start evolving their hard wired instincts, adding cars into the mix.”

We watched out Alex's window as a car came down our street. A squirrel from our yard darted out in front of the car, stopped midway across, froze for a second before darting back to our yard.

“OHHH!” we both called out as the car barely missed the squirrel.

I looked over at Alex. “Seriously! What was the reason for that!”

Alex looked impressed. “Hey, he missed getting squished by an inch!” Alex looked over at me. “Maybe he's practicing trying to add cars to his hard wired instincts.”

I had to laugh. “Now who's giving them way too much credit?”

1940's CHRISTMAS

Fort Hancock was once a bustling Army base at the end of Sandy Hook NJ. Its whole purpose was to protect the New York Harbor during the World Wars. During World War II the population at the Fort was between 7,000 to 12,000 soldiers. This piece takes place at Fort Hancock which is now an historic landmark.

My girlfriend, Kathy sent me a text that one of the houses on Officers Row was going to be decorated in the 1940's era when the fort was at it's busiest. I was in!

The day of the event I swung by her house to picked her up. It was a foggy, drizzly day but we were both still excited to go.

“I've always wanted to get into one of the houses out there.” I said as we drove through the entrance of the park and started the long drive out to the Fort. Sand dunes were on each side of us as we passed the empty parking lots that, in the summer, would be packed with cars.

We parked the car and began walking along Officers Row. “Can you image living out here?” I asked as I pulled my collar up higher and braced myself from the wind whipping across the Raritan Bay.

“Not in the winter I can't!” Kathy said as we both climbed up the front steps.

Once we stepped through the door I began to feel as if I was being taken back to a different time. Men and women dressed in uniform from the 40's were stationed in every room ready to answer our questions.

Kathy and I went into the living room where the Christmas tree stood. The furnishings were from the 1940's, but instead of feeling like we'd just stepped into a museum I was really feeling like I was a little girl again who'd just stepped into my great Aunt's house!

“I think we had one of those.” I whispered as I pointed to side table.

We walked through the dining room and into the butler's pantry. It was stocked with so many familiar containers of spices and food items that I was beginning to feel old. I pointed to the apple slicer. “We had one of those too.” I sighed.

Another guest leaned over and said. “I feel like I could go into my kitchen right now and bring some things over here to add to their collection.”

Kathy and I both nodded in agreement.

We moved on to the kitchen. Kathy picked up an old potato masher. “Oh my gosh! I still have one of those!” I cried.

“Me too.” Kathy said as she put it back down on the table.

We moved upstairs where the nursery and other bedrooms were. We were greeted by a young gentleman dressed in 1940's uniform. He began explaining to us a little bit more of what it was like to live out on the peninsula.

“How bad was it in the winter?” I asked.

“It was bad enough that they used to nail the front doors shut when the wind kicked up and it snowed.”

Kathy and I just shook our heads. “It doesn't sound like much fun.”

“Oh, they had fun.” The officer explained. “They were still ballroom dancing then. In fact, you couldn't graduate West Point without taking ballroom dancing classes.”

I looked over at Kathy. “I had no idea! Did you?”

Kathy shook her head. “I've never heard of that.”

Our officer went on to explain some more about life in the 40's.

Another group came up the stairs and we wanted our officer friend to share his stories with them. Thanking him we went back down the stairs admiring the woodwork and small details you wouldn't expect to see in military housing.

Back out on the front steps I wanted to stop and admire the view they had from their front porch. Picturing them sitting in rocking chairs looking out over the Raritan Bay. But the wind had picked up and it was back to drizzling again so instead we hurried back to the car ready to enjoy the view from the warmth of the car.

A WHIRL OF STARLINGS

I was standing in front of the kitchen window looking out at our bird feeders when my son Alex came into the room.

“What are you looking at?” he asked as passed by me to go feed our beta fish Bubba.

“Remember how we both kept forgetting to fill the bird feeders this week?”

Alex picked up the small container of fish food and shook it in front of the tank. Bubba saw the container and swam out of his pineapple house and up to the top of the tank. “Of yeah, I'll fill them when I'm done here.”

“Don't worry, I filled them this morning.” I looked over at Alex as he dropped the pellets into the tank and closed the lid.

“Remember how I was complaining that without the feeders I wasn't see any birds at all?” I stepped out of his way as he headed to the sink to wash his hands.

Alex nodded his head yes as he turned on the water and reached over to get some liquid hand soap. “And I said the reason you weren't seeing any birds wasn't because of the empty feeders but because most of the birds had already flown south for the winter.” He took his soapy hands and began rinsing them off.

I pointed out the window. “I think I was the one who was right.”

Alex looked out at our back yard filled hundreds of starlings. Their black iridescent feathers catching the sunlight in such a way that they were really beautiful to watch as they swung from the feeders and covered the ground underneath.

“WOW!” Alex shook his head in disbelief. He turned off the water and reached for a paper towel. “I've never seem so many birds in one spot!”

“Starlings are pretty social birds, they like hanging out in big groups. But I've never seen this many at once.” I walked over to the back door. “Watch this.” I opened the door and the sound startled them, causing the hundreds of grackles to lift off at once swooping into the nearby trees. I stepped outside looking at the limbs of the trees filled with the birds. I looked back at Alex and smiled.

“Why'd you scare them like that?” Alex sounded annoyed as he dropped his paper towel in the garbage.

“Hey, it isn't the first time I've done it.” I closed the door and stepped over to the window next to him again. “Just wait.” I said.

We looked out the window and within seconds they were all back down on the ground eating again.

“See? They're all happy again.” I said.

Alex looked confused. “I still don't get it. Why did you want them to fly away, then come back?”

I looked over at Alex. “Because it fascinates me. Did you notice that even when they were startled they all flew as a group. Not one crashing into another.” I shook my head and sighed. “It just amazes me.” I looked back out the window. “Could you imagine that many people all in one place and something startling them?” I looked back over to Alex and pointed out the window. “It wouldn't be a beautifully orchestrated flight like we just saw, I can tell you that! It would be total mayhem! I can't even get down the aisle of the grocery store without someone bumping into my cart.”

Alex shook his head and laughed as he patted me on the shoulder. “You really do think of the weirdest things.”

CALM

The Christmas tree was up and some gifts were already wrapped and under the tree. I scanned the room looking to see what was next.

My husband Steven came into the room. “What are you looking for?” he asked as he scanned the room with me.

“What to do next.” I said as I walked into the kitchen and took a pad and pen out of the drawer. “I have to start my lists!” I held up the pad and pen for him to see. “You know, having a nice Christmas isn't magical!” I sat at the dining room table. “It's a lot of work! I need to be organized, making lists to make sure everything gets done!”

Steven came over and stood next to me. “You know Christmas is weeks away.” He looked over my shoulder to see what I was writing. “You're writing the menus for Christmas breakfast?” he started to laugh.

“Hey! You'll thank me when you have hash browns, bacon, eggs and croissants on Christmas morning!”

My son Alex walked into the room. “We're having hash browns, bacon and eggs Christmas morning?”

“Don't forget the croissants.” Steven reminded him.

“See, that's exactly why I make lists.” I ripped the page from the pad. “Okay that's done. What's on the dinner menu?”

Steven shook his head as he walked past Alex and patted him on the shoulder. “I'm leaving this one to you.”

Alex nodded than sat down across from me at the table. “When was the last time you meditated?” he asked.

“What?” I shook my head. “I don't have time to meditate! It's days before Christmas!”

“You're acting like you've had six cups of tea.”

“I only had two.” I shot back.

“You're never going to enjoy the holidays if you keep up this pace.”

I sighed. “I know, but I just don't have time to meditate.”

“It's ten minutes.” Alex picked up my phone and pointed to the meditation app I'd downloaded over the summer. “Ten minutes.” he said again.

“Fine.” I sighed. “I'll meditate.” I took my phone and grabbed my earbuds, then headed to my bedroom. I laid on my bed and put my earbuds in then tapped on my meditation app. The soothing female voice welcomed me as the sounds of burbling water and birds could be heard in the background.

I listened as she told me to follow my breath, explaining why I needed to clear my head of daily struggles. I smiled as I closed my eyes and fell further and further into the pillows of my bed.

Twenty minutes later there was a knock on my door. I opened my eyes to see Alex standing in the doorway. “How was the meditation?” he asked. “Do you do two of them?”

I sat up pulling, the earbuds out of my ears. “I'm not sure I'd call it meditation.” I stood up and did a quick stretch. “I'm pretty sure I just took a nap.”

“Meditation, nap.” Alex laughed as he shrugged his shoulders. “Doesn't matter what you call it as long as you feel better. Right?”

“I do feel better.” I said I put my hand up to my mouth, covering a small yawn. “I might actually do another one a little later.”